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The Mom Blog ~ OC Register staff and guest writers share their parenting stories.

Mommy likes the idea of vigilante etiquette justice

April 5th, 2008, 6:00 am · 6 Comments · posted by Suzanne Broughton, Contributing Writer

While on the Disney Cruise, I was in one of those teensy, weensy ship bathrooms with Ben … ummm … for a long time. If you have kids, you know you spend an enormous amount of time in the WC, especially during dinner or right when you fill your basket at Target.

Sadly, it’s no different on a ship. So, there I was staring at the blue and white tile with little Mickey heads on them and a woman came in, sat down and dialed. She then proceeded to chatter aimlessly with the equally chatty chatterer on the other end.

I have a few questions for that woman: At what level of friendship and intimacy do you have to be with someone to chat with them, well, there? Why would you think any one of us innocent bathroom goers, would want to hear, in detail, every last thing you have eaten since the ship sailed?

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I could see if you had a bathroom emergency at exactly the same time you had a phone emergency — the two emergencies calling for the separate elements to be coupled together, briefly, then never letting them meet again. But this was no urgent call for the Southern Belle, just a little respite time to “catch up.”

I thought surely she would hang up before the flush, but no, it was, “Oh Jules, hold on …” Whoooshhhhh “Blah … no shrimp … blah …butter in their scrambled eggs … blah.” It became brutally clear to me she does this all the time.

I said to myself “This is preposterous!” (Which I say to myself a lot and I always agree with myself that it is.) Well, then I just couldn’t help myself (having full agreement)… I just started feverishly flushing and flushing and flushing. Ben, still perched, said, “Mom, why you do that?” Because mommy likes the idea of vigilante etiquette justice.

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 6 Comments

  • The husband says:

    FLUSH ON!!! I thought this was gender based. I also find rattling the paper towel dispenser or turning on ALL the hand dryers before I leave is very satisfying too! Get off the phone and take care of one business dealing at a time!

  • Roxanne Hack says:

    Oh my! That’s insane! I always get equally annoyed when I’m in a stall between two girls who know each other, and they continue to chat over my stall. I’d really just rather we all have a quick moment of silence in there…

    And public cell phone talkers in general make me crazy. In bookstores, in check out lines, in movie theaters. Worst of all, of course: behind the wheel of a car.

    Does EVERY second of our lives have to be filled with mindless chatter?

  • I was recently shopping with a girlfriend when we stopped to use the facilities. She is one of my closest friends- so I was surprised to find out…she is a bathroom talker. As we both went into our stalls- she started talking to me! Asking me about this and that…..and even my kids know ‘mommy doesn’t talk when she is in the bathroom’……unless someone is bleeding from an injury on the otherside-my boys are not allowed to yell at me thru the door “mom where is my gameboy?!!!!’……………………I guess I am gonna have to let my girlfriend know this rule too. Bathroom talking stinks!

  • Melinda H. says:

    Repeated flushings just to mess with the other lady?? That is hilarious!!!! I’m not normally a vindictive person but repeatedly flushing the toilet isn’t mean enough to feel guilty about…good for you!

  • GXinstructorMOM says:

    Too funny. Yeah, people have become waaaay too dependent on their electronic devices. I survived high school, college, and part of my grown-up life without them! I think I got my first cell phone when I was pregnant with my first son in 1996. They really are convenient at times but it does annoy me when many people seem to have them permanently attached to their head. You know what’s even more annoying? When people have their headsets on and I can’t tell if they’re talking to me or not. I have actually on a couple of occasions looked like a complete idiot replying to someone with a headset on who was on the cell phone!! …on a different note….a quick question for you Suzanne…at what age do you think the Disney cruise is “too babyish”?? I have a 11, 10, 8year old twins, and a 2 year old.

  • Suzanne Broughton says:

    Hello GX (chummy nickname I have given you),
    Thanks for your comment.
    Disney really goes out of their way to accommodate kids all the way up to teens. We had two eight-year-olds and a ten-year-old with us and they had a blast! Disney breaks the kids into groups by age and designs activities to make them happy.
    If you go to the Disney Cruise website and watch their podcast about activities for kids it will give you a very good idea of what to expect.
    Thanks again for the comment.
    Suz
    PS I really don’t work for Disney, it sounds like I do, but I don’t.